Dear Mr. Hotsy-totsy Steinbrenner:
So, you've finally decided to get rid of Joe Torre. Might then I be permitted to suggest a suitable replacement. No, not the Italianishe-koph, Tony LaRussa. How about yours truly, Moshe Fishbein, aka "The Rabbi of Swat."
I was quite a ball player in my day and today, now that I have some time on my hands,I study the game like a scholar. Starting Wang on three days rest. Meshuggeneh. Not when you've got both Pettite and Mussina big-game tested and ready to hurl.
And here's another thing. Not a single Jew on your roster. Even your 40-man roster. Even the Mets had Shaun Green, and the Yankees should have a Jew as well, if not a dozen. Sure, they might not have the muscles of some of your Latins, but for clutch hitting and heads up play, Jews will show your A-Rod a thing or two.
What would the British Empire have been without Disraeli? The Roosevelt Supreme Court with Felix Frankfurter? The mid-30s Tigers, the mid-60s Dodgers without Greenberg and Koufax?
It's time, Mr. Steinbrenner. It's time.
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